Waiting for the next season to come.

I’ve been pondering the milestones of life recently, and how knitted into society it is to reach certain goals. Next year I turn 20, and although it is commonly said that ‘age is just a number’, there seems to be many underlying goals that come along with this new number I’m going to adopt. Whether we like to admit it or not, there are certain age brackets that link to certain achievements as we pass through the years. I feel they’re kind of like little fires that burn away unnoticed until a friend ties the knot with their partner, or scores their dream job, and we suddenly catch sight of them and are burned with the feeling of failure.

As I ponder these achievements I see myself reaching one day, questions start to bubble up about when I will find the eyes of my husband, or the job offer that fits, when will I feel content with my figure, or travel to a new place?
I often present these questions to God, and he gently tells me to have patience, and that things will come in their due time when I am ready for them. Now patience isn’t something we hold to dearly in the society we live in, with fast food and speedy technology, we find ourselves expectant that God will deliver at the same rate, right?

It’s a harsh reality I’ve only been coming to grips with recently, and it may not be something you’ve come to think about. As I look back on the decisions I made and the paths I’ve taken I’ve come to notice that where I’ve seen the most fruit, is where I’ve patiently waited on God. One thing I’d like to address it that often waiting doesn’t mean literally sitting by your bedside in hope that God will magically give you the ability to run a company and you’ll be rich within the following month.
The same goes for women, in that waiting for a husband doesn't often mean sitting in your room digging into song of songs in hope that one day God will bring a man who’ll recite verses such as 'You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you.' (Song of Songs 4:7) 



I feel like when God instructs you to be patient, he wants you to work within the parameters he has currently allowed you to work in, and hold faith that in his timing he will extend those parameters and you’ll be able to step into the new season he has for you. 

Whether this be faithfully serving in your worship team, until you are able to step into leading, or involving yourself in social circles that will allow you to mingle with people until God anoints a time of particular growth in friendship with one person. I’d encourage you to cast off the worries you once held, the burdens from the past, and don’t become anxious or impatient about the future plans God has for you either, but instead direct all or your energy into the present season God has placed you in. Begin working really hard in your workplace, your school, you friendship circles, and God will honour this and bring blessing upon you. You’re in this particular season for a reason; I’d challenge you to ask God how he can use you in it. What skills has he given you to impact the people around you? Are pushing too hard to move onto the next stage, or are you becoming sluggish because of your fear of the future? Seek God in your current season and have faith that you are there for a reason, how is God wanting to use you?

‘For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:

² a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
³ a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
⁴ a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
⁵ a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
⁶ a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
⁷ a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
⁸ a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.

                         (Ecclesiastes 3:1-22)

A City On A Hill

Geographically speaking, Christchurch is far from being situated on a hill. We lay in more of a valley with surrounding hills and mountains that tower over us, but yet I felt God speak this phrase to me very clearly yesterday evening. I quickly hopped on the web and searched the passage of scripture that this came from.
In Matthew 5:14 it says

‘You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden.’ (NIV)

February the 22nd marks the four year anniversary of the earthquake that destroyed this city, but it also marks a time where we became the most malleable form in which God can use us- I will touch in this more in a moment.  We were suddenly in the public eye, news channels jumped on this disaster and it spread like wildfire. I feel this is what really placed us as a city on a hill. This scripture will continue to ring true as we rebuild, slowly building up fresh infrastructure, birthed from minds that suddenly had a whole canvas of a city to work on. Community projects have blossomed like pop up dance-o-mats, poetry walls, and outside movie screenings have adorned this city with hope during this ongoing restoration project. This rebuild will not be a quiet task, it will draw attention no only nationally but internationally and it is pushing me to continue prayerfully that God’s hand is upon this whole process. If we are a city on a hill that cannot be hidden, I want to be a city that shines the light of Christ from every rubble ruined street corner, and every sleek new office building. I desire to be a part of something that has Christ as the centre, and know that if God can speak the stars into existence, he can take the brokenness of this city and make it whole again.

This leads me onto something I touched on before, being malleable in God’s hands. After the quake we became our weakest, as we mourned over loves ones and watched bricks that built up our homes and buildings, tumble around us. The city became a mess of road cones and tears, and we watched as we became very different versions of ourselves than we once knew. But not only did God speak to me about being a city on a hill, the thing that hit me the most this evening was two verses a few above that read,

³You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.
⁴ You’re blessed when you feel you’ve lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you. (THE MSG)

How incredible is it that God loves our brokenness? A person who is willing to become completely undone for the sake of being put back together to become more like him is someone who is treasured in God’s eyes. This evening I began to see God’s heart in the way I view this city. I see how I am intrigued by the fading shop signs and smashed bookcases behind windows. I look upon broken dollhouse-like buildings, and I am reminded of my own brokenness and how lovingly God looks upon my every fault, knowing he has work to do in me. I see how when this city and it’s people are at the end of their rope, there is far more God can do because we are willing for him to take the reins. I see how when we have lost what is most important to us, the embrace of our father is that much more comforting and needed. But most of all, I see myself in these broken city streets and hear my Dad call me his child and let me know the passion I have for this broken city is the passion he has for me. He wants me to run into his arms when I reach the end of my tether, or when I feel I am crumbling in the way this city did, because in times like these he will grow me the most.
I encourage you to be attentive to what God is speaking to you about, and don’t ever feel discounted because of your faults of weaknesses. For when we are at our weakest, it is at this place we are most able to be used by our Father- and he can use you in incredible ways.

Our Worries, One Mystery

What realm does my imagination tend to dwell upon before I am submerged into the unknown? The possibilities that transpire within the unknown itself of course. Mysteries by their inconsistencies may seem to be complex, because we can't quite distinguish an independent variable in their occurrences. 

Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. 

- Proverbs 19: 21

Recently I've been thinking about how this affects my relationship with God and (in one aspect) mysteries are simply just a wide span of imagined possibilities, which ends up shrouding the ultimate conclusion. This ultimate conclusion is the will of God.

My conscience tends to have the attitude to be drawn to what I want, and in consequence; I may worry about the many possibilities that may conflict with it. I find it very easy to worry, and because of this attitude I tend to be bewildered by even the smaller things. For example: the 100 things that can go wrong at a dinner date. "Is my humour overwhelming?" - "Does she actually like the food?" - "Did I actually say YOLO?" etc. You could think of such things hours upon hours, but "worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere” (Erma Bombeck). 

"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." 

- Matthew 6:34

Tomorrow is the word that expresses many mysteries. One who believes that "the true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible” (Oscar Wilde) will understand that a mystery is merely an illusion; formed by the conflicting hopes and despairs of different people. 

To live with mystery is to invest your hopes or despairs into one possibility. But, to live with God is not asking "what will?" But, answering "God's will." I'm not saying you need to fully understand it - even I still don't. Don't keep your eyes on the plan, rather,  keep your heart with the planner. Trust regardless when something goes your way or not, that God's will remains and he plans something even greater and far beyond what we may expect. 




So although tomorrow may seem a mystery, look at today as a gift from God. Is that not why it is called the "present"? (Paraphrased from Bill Keane)